after 7 days i can stop my cravings

#90

Postby Ade,wales » Fri Jul 17, 2015 11:15 pm

I think if I got something on my mind, something that needs sorting, I can't rest til it's done. At the moment it's earning enough to survive comfortably. But it's not something which I can change easily, especially where I live. So I guess that's doing my head in. If this wasn't bothering me I think I could say I'm not far off recovered from this f*****r of an addiction. In a f***ed up way my mind is telling me to grow some weed. But couldn't bring misery to others even if they welcomed it. Hopefully my intelligence will come back and I can do this legit.
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#91

Postby Pixeltiger » Fri Jul 17, 2015 11:26 pm

Ade,

You have come such a long way. I'm sure you're story is inspiring to others who haven't yet got to your stage on the road to recovery. Keep doing it.

Stay involved. It's your life :)
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#92

Postby Ade,wales » Fri Jul 17, 2015 11:30 pm

Thank u pixel.

U r a star for coming back on here just to give and not needing to take. Respect to u. Chwarae teg ( fair play).
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#93

Postby Ade,wales » Sat Jul 18, 2015 11:38 pm

After some encouraging words from Bevano and Pixeltiger I've chilled out a bit. Thanks guys

Just need to get my sh** together, and to realise it's not gonna happen instantly. It's up to me to turn this around. Now I'm not wrecked all the time I can see this as a possibility.

Feel like I've been unlocked from something stopping me from doing what I want to do. But need to relearn how to get it done. Cmon brain. Catchup
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#94

Postby Furtive » Mon Jul 20, 2015 11:13 am

Ade,wales wrote:... my mind is telling me to grow some weed. But couldn't bring misery to others even if they welcomed it. Hopefully my intelligence will come back and I can do this legit.


You can do it legit.
do some studying and pass an exam or two.

Ideally you'll get training and that through work,
But if it's a complete career change, then bite the bullet, & look at courses.
Evening courses,..... whatever the options are.

I did it twice. Complete new start, study, moving city, and debt.
got better jobs as a result, life was bearable, got out of debt.
Once was genetics, another was computer programming.

Now I'm trying again, self-employed, still studying, comes with the job.
I can go back to a salary if I can't handle the stress of self employment
That's the beauty of qualifications - choice.

Dealing weed is not an option, it never was for me.
I'm not a career criminal with false ID and a frightening history of violence.
Could study for it and get it, but....

Can't face life doing something I can't be proud of.
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#95

Postby Pixeltiger » Mon Jul 20, 2015 5:29 pm

Your right, Ade. It's not gonna happen instantly.

Try to look at the positives that come with a clear head rather than the negatives of withdrawal.

The negatives will diminish over time. The positives will keep getting stronger.
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#96

Postby Ade,wales » Tue Jul 21, 2015 9:34 pm

Thanks pixel and furtive
Guess I needed the encouragement and feeling there is a possibility. Not really given a sh** about it until now, but actually want to get on and do something. I guess that's the first step. Signs of a change right there.


Have felt a bit better this last week. Have been drinking caffeine free tea, maybe coincidence.
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#97

Postby Ade,wales » Wed Aug 05, 2015 7:58 pm

7 months!

Still struggling a bit. Can't really put my finger on it. feels like I'm taking a few steps backwards.
Brain not working up to full speed, almost like I'm a bit stoned, little motivation, bit moody.
Was hoping by this time things would be all good.
Hopefully it's just a small part of the process that won't last too long.
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#98

Postby Pixeltiger » Wed Aug 05, 2015 8:47 pm

As you say it's just a small part of the process.

It's also worth remembering that some days are just crappy days and have nothing to do with quitting. The great thing about being clean (once you've been clean for maybe a year) is that at least you know that your moods are your own. They are not the product of messing with your brain's chemistry by polluting it with narcotics.

There is a real satisfaction in knowing this.

Keep posting Ade. Stay involved
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#99

Postby Ade,wales » Thu Aug 06, 2015 2:17 pm

A couple of times a week I'm dreaming about skinning up but never actually smoking it. I wonder if this is the evil part of my mind still trying to trick me into it again. Hoping it will give up soon after it realises it ain't gonna happen. And once it stops my brain recovery will advance again.

Been reading Biggiesize posts from years ago. He had the same problems as me and said major improvements came around 8-9 months. Hopefully not too long to go
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#100

Postby Wave » Thu Aug 06, 2015 4:23 pm

Well done mate!! I think it is just that we both no longer have the ability to feel great and chilled when we fancy via smoking/vaping. But when you take into all the other negative aspects of this addiction it is just not worth it.

I too have felt not great at times but feel it is part of the process (over 4 months / at18 months today). I tell myself 2 years will be the time for full recovery.
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#101

Postby Ade,wales » Thu Aug 06, 2015 4:43 pm

Good to hear off u mate. And to see ur still going.

I guess there is no set path for recovery. Everyone is different.

I spoke to a mate of mine the other day. He smoked more than me for longer. He totally changed his life when he quit. Moved 200 miles away and started a structural engineering degree at 48 yrs old. Completely immersed himself into it. Said he was almost unaffected by withdrawals.

I'm living the same life just without the smoke. Got to be realistic and accept it not gonna be easy.
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#102

Postby Wave » Thu Aug 06, 2015 4:50 pm

You don't have to do anything to drastic to change your life. I have done little things like more exercise, eat more fresh beg, cut out soft drinks, cut out fast food and keep busy with other stuff.

Keep activities about to replace the smoking times, like a book, house projects etc.
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#103

Postby Ade,wales » Thu Aug 06, 2015 7:54 pm

Weed was my reward for working all day, I would think, I've spent all day doing something I don't really want to do, so I'm gonna enjoy the rest of the day the way I want.

Now I can't do that, I have been rewarding myself with some booze. Only on weekends and not excessively. Think I'm gonna stop that see if it helps
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#104

Postby Bevano84 » Fri Aug 07, 2015 8:22 am

Ade you Welsh warrior, smashing it as always!!! How's the family bro?

Just put a post up mentioning a book by Jonathan haidt happiness hypothesis. ... have a bash bud I think it would help you at mo.

any thoughts on what will create your purpose apart from family moving forwards pal?
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