6 Months in!

Postby A.J.S. » Sat May 16, 2015 12:53 pm

Hi everyone, yesterday was my 6 months without smoking weed. I smoked heavily for 15 years since I was about 14. Not sure why I started really, I live in Canada and most people I grew up with did it so i didn't really think much about it. I never thought it would have any bad effects on me other then maybe the same ones cigarettes would, cough, lung problems etc.. Not that those arnt bad but I had no idea about the psychological ones. One day out of nowhere I had a bad panic attack when I wasn't high, it was a time I would normally would have been smoking but I was trying to cut back so I wasnt. Anyways, after that point every time I smoked it gave me bad anxiety. I smoked off And on after that for the next 6 months not knowing it had anything to do with weed. Eventually I came to the conclusion that quitting was Probobly the best choice, it just wasn't giving me the same feeling when I smoked anymore and I wasn't enjoying it the same. Stopping was pretty easy for me, I did t have much desire to smoke anymore. I think because I was more scared then anything and that Probobly helped. The hard part is dealing with the other aspects of quiting like anxiety, depression, intrusive thoughts, headaches, sleeping problems etc. it has been a bit better lately when I think about how I was in the beginning but it's like every 4-6 weeks I have about 5-10 days of feeling like crap. Everything will calm down a bit and I'll feel ok for a while, not great just ok, and then it hits again. By ok I just mean not horribly anxious and depressed, I havnt really felt overy happy or excited yet. When I get into these low periods it's very hard to see the progress I have made and convince myself that I'm not crazy and this is all just PAWS. I really can't see it being anything else, I've never been an anxious or depressed person and have no family history of anything like this. I'm hoping that things keep getting a little bit better everyday. I know from reading on here that it can be a long process of 2 years or more so I guess I have to be more patient. It is really hard to go to work and act yourself and not let your body language show how you're feeling, some days it must be pretty obvious, but when I think of when it first started and I would have to go to the washroom and cry 5 times a day I can see I'm passes that point. Hopefully the next 6 months are better then the first. Good luck to anyone going through this, if you can get through this and become a better person you have the willpower do get through anything.
A.J.S.
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#1

Postby olskoolru » Tue May 19, 2015 7:58 pm

Congratulations Ajs,

6 months is a HUGE milestone considering you smoked for 15 years. Your story is so similar to many stories I've heard on my journey. That panic attack out of nowhere and the weed turning against you.
You are now in a healing and recovery phase and recommend that you change your life for the better. When weed is such a huge part of our lives and we leave it, we have to fill that void with something. I'm at about 2 years 5 months, I think. Stopped counting as obsessively as I used to. My life has changed for the better. Weed is so in my past now that I can't believe that now I look forward to watching a good show after work with a delicious meal and no blunt. 2 plus years ago I would've never imagined this kind of life. My temper is consistent finally and that was the most obvious change. My wife says I am a 100% different person for the better.

Again, congratulations on your decision to quit and for the 6 months. PAWS explains what you are going through, but you have to dig deep into yourself to change your life. That's the hard part.

You came to the right place! I also invite you to Google: Dopamine Dialogues and go to the withdrawal section. Great info and the comment section is even better.

OSR
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#2

Postby Broken stoner » Thu May 21, 2015 7:13 am

Congratulations on 6 months, we quit for the same exact reason and I know what you mean exactly, by not feeling great but ok, then you just get slumped for many days, I experienced some improvements around 7-8 months nothing major just felt better an in more control of the anxiety keep your head up. Get out and talk to people don't worry about how other people perceive you, you are yourself either they like you or they don't it don't matter, the only thing that matters is you know you are doing this to better yourself with that mentality you won't be stopped best of luck.
-broken boy
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#3

Postby A.J.S. » Thu May 21, 2015 12:16 pm

Thanks for taking the time to reply. You both are definately a big inspiration to me and I'm happy to see you're coming out of this feeling good. Weed is such a misunderstood addiction. I'm so happy to have found this forum, it's gave me a lot of relief to know that I'm not the only one going through this stuff and I'm not suffering from a mental illness. I've decided to not try medication. I can see lots of improvements from when I first stopped. I figure as long as I'm gettig better I want to give it a full 2 years before making a decision to use anti depressants. The worst is over so if I made it through that then I should have no problem making through the next part of it. I find it really interesting that this is a forum for all addictions and 99% of the people here are on here for marijuana. Just goes to show how misunderstood it is. I'm sure there lots of people that go their whole life smoking with no problems and that's great for them but for lots of people that's not the case. Good luck everyone.
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#4

Postby A.J.S. » Thu May 21, 2015 1:05 pm

Has anyone ever felt many high's and low's throughout the day? Feeling somewhat normal for a few minutes to an hour then low again. Somedays I feel many ups and downs. At the begining they were much more magnified. But seem to be getting lighter.
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#5

Postby Wave » Thu May 21, 2015 4:13 pm

I am about 7 weeks in and can totally relate to the constant swing of mood. I almost finding that the better I feel in a good mood, the worse I will feel later/next day.

I have seem some improvement in my mood fluctuation already and sleep is also slowly improving but it is an incredibly slow process and readying your post makes me realise how long this is going to take!!

Well done so far and keep going!
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#6

Postby Broken stoner » Thu May 21, 2015 6:47 pm

I feel good for a few hours then feel zoned out for a few hours, I'll feel like i have tons of energy for a few hours then I'll feel like I don't have any energy at all, this is all completely normal ajs. I still feel like this sometimes its way less intense then it was 6 months ago but you will be fine. All paws related at 6 months I was questioning reality and had a lot of deep thoughts about if life was real and if were all just a tv show someone's watching on a computer screen you seem to be doing fine keep up the good work.
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#7

Postby johnmckee » Fri May 22, 2015 5:06 am

Congrats on 6 months.

[url=http://quitmarijuana.org/marijuana-withdrawal-panic-attack/]Panic attacks from withdrawal[url] can be brutal. Things do get better. Part of it is dealing with the emotions, and part of it is figuring out what 'normal' is after being stoned for so long.

John
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#8

Postby Addumb » Sun May 24, 2015 12:34 am

I'm at the same point as you and feel close to the same way. My emotions vary from hour to hour and day to day, though not nearly as bad as when I first quit. During the beginning, I could go from ecstatic one second to suicidal the next. Now, I am much more stable with a consistent flat mood. Acting like a normal person might have gotten easier, but it's still not automatic. Reading your story gives me hope that I'm normal (for a recovering weed head but still). Keep up the good attitude, and I'm one day we'll both feel alive again.
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#9

Postby lmcbride » Fri Dec 11, 2015 12:38 am

Hey just stumbled across this forum.

How is everyone doing? I'm 4 months into my battle and want to hear some success stories!!
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#10

Postby Coley546 » Wed Dec 16, 2015 11:38 pm

This story is almost identical to mine. I smoked for 16 years everyday. I'm at 6 months now and at least feel like I can function. Everyday is still a small battle but much better than the first few months. I get real down after I feel good for a bit and then have a setback. It's hard not to when you feel like sh** after feeling good. I just remind myself everyday that this too shall pass and can only get better not worse. Wish I could find a success story of someone who feels 100 percent better. Seems like everyone has lingering effects forever.
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#11

Postby lmcbride » Wed Dec 16, 2015 11:49 pm

Coley-

There are success stories on this forum of people who have ended up feeling 10X better than when they were smoking.

I've read stories of people who are gushing over how great life is on the other side.

I know I'll get there too, and I I can't wait!
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