Does this girl really like me?

Postby adr_dsouza » Wed Mar 23, 2016 9:07 am

I am a 26 year old guy, University student who will be graduating in a few days and my classes are done for good. So no more going back to university except to write my final exams.

Well to start off with there is this girl in my class who seemed to like me .She used to stare at me and smile, try to engage in conversation sometimes and once when I had requested for a couple of notes on my class WhatsApp group chat she was the only person to send them to me. But above all the incident which clearly stands out, and me remembering it vividly was on one occasion she came close to me and brushed up her body against mine. I was a bit taken aback by surprise and moved her away from her.

I didn't respond favorably to all these moves made by her because at that time I wasn't having the same feelings towards her and part because I am too socially awkward and shy of the opposite sex. Infact I did not acknowledge all these moves.Either I just ignored her or responded in a cold manner.

Now the question is in these last 4 months of university classes she hasn't made any moves on me and I'm wondering as to why? and the problem now is that I find myself developing feelings for her when she has seemed to have lost interest in me.

My friend in class told her that I do like her but she just brushed it off lightly by laughing it off and saying shes not interested in front of me. however I did catch her looking at me once or twice after this. but her look was serious.

I did send her a Facebook request 2 days back but its still not accepted as of now. All my friends are telling me to go up to her and ask her out but I'm to shy and also scared of her rejecting me the fact that i have not engaged in any conversation with her while in class. And now its too late since I'm done with university and we are not going to see each other again.

Did this girl like me? Does she still like me now? I would like to the outlook of you folks out there on this matter... What do I do now?
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Mar 23, 2016 12:45 pm

She might have had an initial attraction, but many times that attraction fades if a man displays a lack of confidence. Women like confident men.

Learning to handle rejection is a life skill. Do not avoid it, deal with it. Ask her out as soon as she accepts your request. Do not hesitate, don't play games.
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#2

Postby laureat » Wed Mar 23, 2016 1:53 pm

What i consider to be important is to have a positive experiences with people around

You dont really want to see again someone that all you remember from is some kind of unwanted situation

You want to see people you have positive experiences with it could also be your favorite actor, your favorite atlethe or whomever you want to see again because those positive experiences that you had through tv, internet, or no matter where

When someone smile, thats really cool i dont know whats that you guys do but its positive experience and you want to see each other again and again, this is the magic, if i see thatperson he makes me feel better i want to see him/her again and again
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#3

Postby WonderGurl » Wed Mar 23, 2016 7:56 pm

adr_dsouza wrote: I did send her a Facebook request 2 days back but its still not accepted as of now. All my friends are telling me to go up to her and ask her out but I'm to shy and also scared of her rejecting me the fact that i have not engaged in any conversation with her while in class. And now its too late since I'm done with university and we are not going to see each other again.

Did this girl like me? Does she still like me now? I would like to the outlook of you folks out there on this matter... What do I do now?


There's no point agonising over it. Regardless of whether or not she accepts the request, do what your friends are saying you should: go over to her and ask her out. It's either going to be a 'yes' or a 'no'.
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#4

Postby Candid » Wed Mar 23, 2016 9:51 pm

adr_dsouza wrote:Did this girl like me? Does she still like me now?


Who knows, other than her?

What do I do now?


With final exams coming up, you need to make a move now or forget about it. I suggest you don't do anything so bold as ask her out, yet. Approach her after the exam and ask if she'd like to get coffee and debrief from it. If she's reluctant to go with you, you have your answer. If she goes with you and seems reluctant to leave, ask her out. There's no harm done if she says no, because you won't be seeing her again. Right?
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#5

Postby adr_dsouza » Thu Mar 24, 2016 6:15 pm

I really have no courage to ask her out in person because I ignored her advances and do not have a rapport with her. Normally one should have a little bit of rapport with the other person to ask him/her out.

Is texting her a good idea? What should I text her?
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#6

Postby WonderGurl » Thu Mar 24, 2016 6:32 pm

Say something like you wanted to say hi and ask her how she's doing getting ready for the exams or something. That'll do you for some rapport. If she responds, you could ask her out.
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#7

Postby adr_dsouza » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:41 am

WonderGurl wrote:Say something like you wanted to say hi and ask her how she's doing getting ready for the exams or something. That'll do you for some rapport. If she responds, you could ask her out.


Do I ask her this in person or through texting?
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#8

Postby WonderGurl » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:47 am

What do you yourself feel is the best way to go?
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#9

Postby adr_dsouza » Fri Mar 25, 2016 10:53 am

WonderGurl wrote:What do you yourself feel is the best way to go?


The best way is talking to her in person but I'm too scared so will texting be OK?
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#10

Postby WonderGurl » Fri Mar 25, 2016 11:08 am

You need to find the confidence in yourself so that whichever way you decide to proceed, you are comfortable with it. If you cannot find that confidence just yet, I'm afraid, you'll just have to fake it till you make it. Nobody can tell you which way is the better way as everyone is different, only you will know.
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#11

Postby adr_dsouza » Fri Mar 25, 2016 11:27 am

Thanks wonder girl for your advice. I remember that you were one of the first person to help me in my very first post here on this forum which was 2 years ago and fortunately enough nothing bad has happened ever since (with reference to that post) .

Good to see that your still active on these forums including richard and a few familiar old ones too :)

I personally feel a friendly comforting touch in you and Richard :-)
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#12

Postby WonderGurl » Fri Mar 25, 2016 12:05 pm

Aw, that's so sweet of you to say that! Glad to be able to help :)
And yes, Richard has a sound take on things.
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#13

Postby laureat » Fri Mar 25, 2016 1:58 pm

Hi there again

As you said you are too much scared to approach that girl is because it has became too much important to you, there is pressure or making it work 100%

1. You have to believe in yourself that you are good enough for this girl
2. You have to keep insistint to get what you want, you should not quit too easy just because someone rejects you or something like that, you should keep insisting to get what you want, aw i cant have your phone number? Ok how about a walk for 5 minutes? No? You look nice today, i been here i been there, blla bla bla , how about a selfie? Lets go buy an ice cream over there,

So you keep insistint to get what you want , even if she doesnt want to, you try to convince her

3. You have to respect the fact if she may not want to
We should never approach a woman with an idea to make it work 100% because she may not want to and that makes us look weird if we try extreme hard,

4. Dont plan everything around someone
I would be shocked if a woman approach me with extreme ideas , like that G GIRL movie , you dont through sharks to someone who rejects you , You always got to have a plan b

If this woman doesnt want , i have other targets, so the pressure is not so extreme because she is not the end of the world, must do situation, i have a plan b woman which ia really really cool aswell

And you have confidence in yourself that you will be happy and fine so there is no need to be desperate about someone you have your plan b wich is cool

And so on this way you take some of the pressure of
Yes i really like the girl i want to go out
Yes i trust myself i am good enough for her
Yes i will keep insisting to get what i want
Sure i have a plan b so i am ok even if this doesnt work out
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#14

Postby adr_dsouza » Fri Mar 25, 2016 8:08 pm

Any idea why she has not accepted my Facebook friend request? Its been 4 days since I sent her the request....
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