How do I help someone with OCD?

Postby turtleswim » Mon Aug 15, 2016 6:33 pm

My sister has extreme OCD. She has shut off all family from contact. I talked to a friend about it. He said give her space. I wrote her two short emails just now. I don't think she is suicidal. It is hard to deal with the knowledge that I may not see or hear from her again for months. She comes out for a couple holidays. I need to accept the fact that she has rights. She has the right to her own privacy. I live a few blocks from her. I should deal with my grief and let her be. Demanding anything from her will only make her more upset. Anybody out there have a brother or sister with OCD? I think I can navigate my day. Any ideas about how to keep things sane would be appreciated. I will chat with a family therapist on Thursday.
Thanks,
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Mon Aug 15, 2016 6:41 pm

turtleswim wrote: I need to accept the fact that she has rights. She has the right to her own privacy. I live a few blocks from her. I should deal with my grief and let her be.


Exactly. Leave her alone.

She has your email, she knows where you live. If she wants your help, if she wants a relationship with you, then she will talk with you. If you simply can't accept she has a right to privacy, you can periodically...meaning once a week at the very most, send her a letter in the mail, send her a short email that says hello, hope you are well.

If and when she begins to communicate again with you, then you can begin to consider how to further develop the relationship, up to and including helping her with any difficulties she may be facing. But, until you get the first step, until you get the communication established, give her space.
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#2

Postby This-isnt-me » Mon Aug 15, 2016 11:52 pm

Did you offer your help in the emails? Offer to grab some things for her while you're out, try not to make it sound like you're pestering or babying her, you know she can do things herself but if it's convenient you wouldn't mind. Offer to do things you know she hates like mowing the lawn or fixing the car, etc. Start or small and slow. Good luck!
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#3

Postby diaz212 » Tue Aug 16, 2016 7:29 am

OCD is some serious mental illness my friends. I suggest you go to therapist
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#4

Postby turtleswim » Wed Aug 17, 2016 1:40 am

hi. thanks for the replies. i will see my therapist in a couple days. i have gratitude that uncommon knowledge is such a helpful website. I think it is inspiring and a source of inspiration. I feel like I can come here for some advise that may or may not be interesting. I also know that I should keep things confidential and follow the rules and ettiquette. I think I will be careful not to write too much that might be too private. In general, my sister is doing OK. She did have a random nervous episode last week. She is on the mend and working on being mindful. She wants to be good to herself so the family feels better that she is motivated to cultivate mindfulness and be will within.
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#5

Postby JuliusFawcett » Sun Aug 21, 2016 7:55 am

Continue to set a sane, healthy and happy example of how to live and trust that she may be able to follow your example of how to live
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